Living with a preacher.......

Cycle 2/day 38 of chemo

By sherry

I got up pretty grouchy today. Some days I open my eye after a peaceful night's sleep and then remember "....cancer". Ugh. Those days make tough mornings.
Terence and I always have our coffee in front of the fireplace the living room and talk about what we believe the Lord is doing in our life, then we talk about or hopes and then deliberate a plan for the day, based on how he is feeling.

Well, today he wasn't feeling very well. Still having some pain and feeling a little weak and tired. After we talked, he needed to lay down and take a mid morning nap, which left me feeling a little pressured to get stuff done around here. I posted on my FB page the moment I was faced with the temptation with being really sad (lonely) or mad (irritated that I am left with the burden of things).

Terence had noticed during our coffee time, at first my sullenness and then my irritability. So before he left for his power nap, he 'encouraged' me with this:

T encouraging me today.

 "Sherry, why are you looking at your life and wondering if God hears you?  You feel like giving up because living life seems harder than you thought?  You're not alone! I experience the same, but there is encouragement!
God is faithful!"

 “God is faithful, by whom ye were called unto the fellowship of his Son Jesus Christ our Lord” (1 Corinthians 1:9).

He kissed my head (Terence, not God)  and went and took a nap.  At first I started to get mad (because I felt burdened, overwhelmed & left alone), then really lonely and sad.

I knew Terence was right. I can't make it through this
time in my life without remembering that God hears me and that He is faithful. I turned to the book of Nehemiah to encourage myself and found;"...and do not be grieved, for the joy of the LORD is your strength..."(Neh. 8:9).

Annie, 3 years old.

So I got up, got dressed and started packing up a few boxes and called my daughter Nadine and asked if I could pick up my little Annie bug- I figured she could keep me company un-packing at the new house. 

Jeez, the joy of the Lord filled my heart as she sat in the back seat of my car telling me the funniest stories from her little car seat!

Story 1: "Hey Mamai, I saw Santa Clause at the club (YMCA) today". Me: really? Did you tell him what you want for Christmas?" Annie: "no, he just waved so I waved back. He was busy working out because he's fat"

Story 2: " Where's Papi? I can smell him- he must be somewhere, are you hiding him? Is this a surprise?"

Story #3 "If Papi gets a hippopatamus for Christmas where will it sleep? Cead (our lab) won't share  her bed! So maybe he can spend the night at my house?  And "she" can be a ballet dancer- oh! she can borrow one of my tuu tuu's".

Story #4   (Looking at Terence's stuffed pheasant packed in box)"Is this bird alive?"

                 Me: no, it's stuffed, like a statue"

                 Annie: "why is it stuffed?"

                 Me: "because Papi shot it"

                 Annie: "why did Papi shoot it?"

                 Me: "because he's a hunter".

                 Annie: (quiet)...... "I'll call her Tizzy  (turns to yell at the bird)- 'If you can hear me; 

                 hi Tizzy, sorry you're dead!"

I laughed and laughed all the way to the new house.  What a joy.  I found new strength to face the day, overcome sadness and madness and enjoy my kids, grand kids, my husband, and yes, even moving turned out to be a joyful event!

Living above cancer is not denying it.

But by the grace of God, we can defy it's devastating effect on our lives.


His grace visited me today (Annie!), filled my heart with joy and strengthened me tremendously!

~Sherry